FAT BOY
Shane Allison

I’m barely awake checking emails
And social media messages
When my mother asks me 
If I want anything from the store. 
She does this sometimes,
As if she’s some kind of space Martian
From Mars who is new to planet Earth
And doesn’t know her way around a supermarket.
With sleep seeds still in my eyes,
I tell her to get yogurt,
Turkey cold cuts, and chicken pot pies.
I tell her to throw waffles in the cart,
Plums and green grapes without the seeds.
I know she’ll forget most of what I ask 
For, like kiwi and dragon fruit.
Raisin bread instead of Cherry plums.
I don’t want to clutter the corners of her mind
With things like blackberries and almond milk.
Needed ingredients for smoothies
To lower my blood pressure.
She will come home armed 
With an arsenal of bags 
Filled with turkey wings,
Ham hocks,
Neck bones and frozen okra.
Finger cookies for dad 
And canned vegetables pickled in some soupy,
Salty concoction.
She’ll come with chocolate milk,
Sugar Pops and Frosted Flakes,
Zero sugar root beer for Dad’s bad blood
And her kidney disease, which was
News she broke to me in the lobby at the cancer center
Minutes before her CAT scan. 
The calories I burn at Planet Fitness
Will only be regained under her reign
Where everything must be cooked 
With butter, bacon, or grease. 
She doesn’t know that it takes more than push­‑ups
To flatten a belly like this.
A thousand thigh crunches to keep them from rubbing together.
My friend Chuck lost 90 pounds on Noom.
I would give both my nuts
To shed 90 pounds of fried food flesh,
Suck out the midnight cravings with a vacuum hose.
My mother doesn’t know what it’s like to look down
And not be able to see your dick without having
To hold your belly in. 
“You look fat sitting on the sofa,” she told me once.
“Are you still going to the gym?” she asked when she
Saw me coming out of the bathroom with my shirt off. 
Tonight I’ll write out a grocery list on the back of this poem:
Pork loin
Salmon
Beet and pomegranate juice
Almond milk,
Yogurt,
Blackberries and whiskey,
A little something extra for the smoothies.